Dad, Mom Farted!!!!!!!
You know I live in a house full of boys…a stinky, burpy, farty, smells like rotten egg house of boys. Farts are a part of my daily life, and it makes me crazy!!!! It’s not that I don’t fart, come on, I’m human. I’m just not a fan of farting at the dinner table, or in bed or basically in front of other people.
So last night we have dinner at the local Indian buffet and it was delicious! After navigating the hell of school supply shopping at Walmart, #3 and I went downstairs to get Mom a drink (it had been a long day…)
And then it hits…the attack of the Indian buffet. With my belly gurgling and confident that #3 has run back up stairs with his juice pouch, I let one rip. Only to immediately hear #3 say (incredulously in a combination of shock and horror), “MOM! Did you fart!?!?!!?!”
Me: (OMG – busted) “Yes.”
Before I could get the three-letter, monosyllabic word out of my mouth he is up the stairs, racing across the house, yelling for my hubby (who, by the way, had already succumbed to the attack of the Indian buffet and had beat me to the shitter).
Fast forward an hour or so…the conversation between my husband and me.
Me: So, I assume #3 told you I farted.
Hubby (laughing): He did.
I recount the story…we’re both laughing so hard I’m about to pee myself.
Hubby: You know, you’ve probably scarred him for life.
And you know, I probably have…just hopefully not from this!!!